Lately, I’ve been reflecting on my time in New York City after reading some books that remind me of my years there—Still Me by Jojo Moyes and The Ladies Who Punch. These stories brought back memories of the city’s energy, the people I met, and the experiences that shaped me. Last week was also the anniversary of moving full-time into NYC over twenty years ago. I have found myself revisiting the lessons the city taught me and how leaving it reshaped my understanding of resilience.
Embracing Change as a Strength
New York is a city of constant movement. When I left, it felt like I was stepping off a high-speed train without knowing what was next. At first, it was unsettling. Yet resilience isn’t about avoiding discomfort—it’s about embracing it. Change is inevitable; the more we learn to adapt, the stronger we become. I discovered that stepping away from the hustle allowed me to hear myself more clearly and redefine my pace. I still enjoy a hustle, just not in the Big Apple.
Success Isn’t Defined by One Location
For so long, I associated success with being in New York. It was the epicenter of my work, social life, and aspirations. Even traveling for work felt special because I brought my expertise from the city to wherever I went. Leaving forced me to rethink what success meant. I learned that it isn’t about where you are but how aligned you feel with your values and goals. It took time, and I found success in new ways—building a career on my terms, prioritizing my well-being, and creating space for personal growth. I still have people comment or ask what I am doing in Vermont, and that shows me that they are limited in their beliefs about what success and happiness mean.
Slowing Down is Not the Same as Giving Up
In a city that glorifies busyness, stepping away can feel like a loss. But I quickly realized that slowing down didn’t mean I was losing momentum—it meant I was regaining clarity. Resilience isn’t just about pushing through; it’s about knowing when to pause, reflect, and recalibrate. Without the constant pressure to be “on,” I found new opportunities more aligned with my long-term vision. I healed my mental and physical health and bought myself more time in the long run.
Community and Connection Can Exist Anywhere
One of my biggest fears about leaving NYC was losing my network. But resilience is about building meaningful connections, not just maintaining proximity. I discovered that community isn’t just about location—it’s about the people you choose to stay connected with and the new relationships you nurture. My support system grew in ways I hadn’t expected, and I learned that we create connections no matter where we are. I am a great long-distance friend who connects with people everywhere I go. That is priceless.
Leaving New York City taught me resilience isn’t about holding on—it’s about knowing when to let go and trust yourself. I’ve built a life that is flexible, fulfilling, and mine. I designed this. I still love my memories of the city. However, I now know that my success and happiness are not tied to any place. Instead, they are rooted in my ability to adapt, redefine, and confidently move forward.
What’s a time in your life when you had to embrace resilience and redefine success?
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